There’s nothing especially vexing about DC, but there’s nothing especially mesmerizing about him either. He’s the boyfriend you’ve always known; you’ve likely been together since you were a teenager. You don’t really consider him the great love of your life, but you’re happy to entertain him from time to time. Eventually the two of you will probably part routes when you find a person who had you actually genuinely love, and he’ll end up in the arms of a younger woman.
Rainier is the guy you hooked up with for most of college, and when you’re in the same city you’ll go back for old time’s sake. There’s nothing particularly wrong with him, but circumstances have never genuinely been on your side. But there are some nice memories you associate with him( and maybe a couple of messy ones) so it’s nice to catch up every now and then.
Lemon La Croix
You’re not sure honestly not sure how he got here but you’ll hangout with him until he calls an Uber to go home, I guess?
He’s your party boyfriend and you’re in a little bit of denial that he likely deals ecstasy on the side for ca$ h. The only period you ever watch him sober is in the morning when you wake up next to him and a Taco Bell wrapper, clearly slept in all of your makeup, and are missing your left shoe.
Cold Brew Coffee
The embodiment of Rob Lowe in Parks and Rec. He never stops talking. Ever. He’s the conversationalist that asks you about your favorite movie and then spins into a 10 -minute speech about the brilliance of Christopher Nolan. He’s also constantly trying to get you to wake up at 6 and go for a run with him. Lol.
He constructs you a little sick to your stomach if you have to hang out with him without someone else as a social barrier.
Pamplemousse La Croix
He’s the foreigner who lives in your building who you totally have the hots for. You love his accent, his style, the route everything about him is just a little different. You definitely have-esque fantasies about the two of you together.
He’s your sugar daddy. The one who reminds you of a life you cannot afford on your own but so, so want. He treats you to the finer things in life. You guys aren’t entirely compatible( plainly) so you only hang out occasionally. But “youre feeling” fairly damn fancy when you’re around him and you really, really like it.
Lime La Croix
Love of their own lives. The moment the two of you got together “youve never” wanted to be apart. Lime is your ride or die, your better half, your.
Poor dude. You literally merely call him when he’s the only option available. And “youve never” remember to treat him the route he deserves and change his filter on time. Again: poor dude.
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